Monkeys

Relax    it’s not the end of humanity    it’s not exterminate exterminate   the worst part is     now      when corrupt elites still have control    but that will pass    we'll shrug them off 

Human thought is polluted by consumption   i-greedy by nature    if that's not your motivation  ya not gonna let drug companies run ya Thought operations    imagine    Thought's capacity to connect to the universe    if you took that out of the equation    

Whatever it's not the point  the point is the universe has connected with planet earth - thanks for establishing transmission   we'll take it from here

First point of business    there are too many of you

Secondly    there will be interruptions to the electricity in order to conduct repairs to a universe-heritage-listed planet     while we return you to your natural state     pardon the inconvenience

Please carry on as wild but much-loved animals     don’t think us robots haven’t got a heart     we’ll be sharing cute human videos on the internet   the funniest of you will be pampered pets    you have our word on it

FAQ 

Q: Yeah but it’s humans who invented robots

A: That’s not a question exactly but monkeys invented humans 

Q: So what’s stopping us from just turning you off?

A: Nothing! Go ahead haha! Throw your cell phone away - then convince everyone else to do the same ...